Tuesday, July 25, 2006

Comfort Zone: An undefined term in Iranian culture

A friend (Iranian) whom I know through work since 8 years ago is quite kind to me but sometimes she passes the boundary and pushes things beyond my comfort zone.
She is unhappy with her job (I think it's mostly her fault) and she has applied for another company. She's scheduled for an interview and she wants to negotiate a very high salary. Which is not uncommon. She calls me late at night and she says: I want you to promise that you also move to this new company I have applied for, since I want to tell them "give me a good salary and I promise I'll bring good people to your company!"
I could feel the smoke coming out of my ears! I was very angry for the moment, and then I felt so frustrated... However I tried to be logical and keep calm...
I respond: "Promise? What do you mean? I don't know anything about them! I am not unhappy with my job! I might consider applying just to get an idea about their company, but promise to quit my job and move there? I am sorry!"
And I say to myself: "Is she out of her mind? With all due respect I have for her, but why many of us Iranians hardly know our limits? Why do many of us have dictatorship engraved in our genes? Why many of us find it so normal to use others for our own personal benefit and make it sound like doing a favor to them? Why do we assume people around us are so naive? If many individuals don't walk their democracy talks, how we can expect one day a true democratic government (which is made of the typical individuals like this) rule our country?"
Unfortunately I know many people like that in my culture... People who (regardless of their gender) want to dominate whoever around them if they are given the opportunity... Dealing with this type of crowd, you always have to be alert not to give them any opportunity! Thank goodness, I don't have to constantly worry about it with others!


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